Ephesians 6.12 reports our struggle is not against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the powers of this dark world and against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly
realms.

Most Christians believe the Bible is absolutely true but few are able to apply its truth absolutely.

While our struggles should be against unseen forces in heavenly places most of us struggle with known forces in our faces! Lately I have been in conflict with some fellow Christians and it hasn’t been pretty. How should Christians disagree?

First we need to remember Whose we are. Christians are considered brothers and sisters in Christ, children adopted by One Father and under One Lord Jesus Christ. No healthy parent insists their children all think alike but every healthy parent wants their children to play well together. When we have conflict with one another we need to stay focused on keeping the relationship above winning the argument. We need to disagree in such a way that we keep the love in the relationship primary and the issue secondary.

Second, when we speak our minds on the subject we do so in love without being rude or personally attacking the person with whom we disagree. Again, our children can’t end their argument with “you’re stupid.” We react when we hear those words because we want our children to love one another above all things. So too when we express our differences we need to keep the discussion at the issue level and not at the personal level. Our disagreements need to focus on the subject, it is the thing we are targeting, and not one another and the winning over one another. The goal is not to place our neighbor in subjection but to understand the problem and solve it or agree to think differently on the subject.

Finally, our Lord, King and Master commanded us to go to one another privately, first, when we have a grievance with one another (Matthew 18). Social media should never be a place where Christians are condemning one another. If we think we are right, after we have made a personal effort to bring resolution without success, we are to invite others into the conversation with the goal being to win our brother, not humiliate them. If the matter is not going to have eternal consequence then Paul’s words to defer to one another should be applied.

Conflict reveals our need for a Savior.

God has provided us such in Jesus Christ our Lord before Whom we all kneel and Whose ways He expects us to obey beginning with, ‘love one another as I have loved you.’