“You desire and do not have. You murder and covet and cannot obtain. You fight and wage war. You do not have because you do not ask. You ask and don’t receive because you ask with wrong motives, so that you may spend it on your pleasures. You adulterous people! Don’t you know that friendship with the world is hostility toward God? So whoever wants to be the friend of the world becomes the enemy of God. Or do you think it’s without reason that the Scripture says: The spirit he made to dwell in us envies intensely? Therefore, submit to God. Resist the devil, and he will flee from you. Draw near to God, and he will draw near to you. Cleanse your hands, sinners, and purify your hearts, you double-minded.” James 4:2-5, 7-8 CSB https://bible.com/bible/1713/jas.4.2-8.CSB

Our relationship with God is a reflection of our love for God. If He seems distant and doesn’t respond to our prayers, it is most likely because we really don’t love Him most and first, as evidenced by our time and purpose. James reminded his Church that unanswered prayer is often the result of wrong requests. God does not cater to our desires. God supplies all of our needs to fulfill His purposes, which He has commanded us to accomplish. We commit spiritual adultery whenever we love something more than God. For me, that is me. I love me, my comfort, my wants, my way, and these are nearly always in conflict with God’s ways of loving Him and others more than myself. We need the discipline of heart and mind to seek God and do His work. This will keep us from becoming increasingly self-absorbed and loving the world’s things, approval, or status. God loves us. He paid for us by His blood. Therefore, like a faithful husband deeply in love with His wife, He jealously watches our souls for any unfaithfulness. Above all else, He wants our deepest affection and for Him to be our greatest desire. Love for God is cultivated by time in Scripture, prayer, encouragement from the Church, and deep engagement with His cause, the building of the kingdom of God upon earth as it is in heaven. If we devote ourselves to these things, we will lose our self-love and increase our love for God in our hearts and through our hands, and more of Him in our lives will be evident to everyone.